Amadeus – Nursery Crimes

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Published on: September 5, 2014

Amadeus – Nursery Crimes

Hello my invisible other…you are in the company of a soul who finds the injustices of this world a trial with no immediate end…a world where oppression abuses the truth… a hidden agenda remains silent in order to inflict silence on the hearts and minds of any soul willing to be victimised…what can I say the devil seems to be having his wicked way…Ignorance and Innocence are poles apart…Amadeus – Nursery Crimes..

Amadeus - Nursery Crimes

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All mind travellers your imaginary mind companion feels inclined to leave this world for a while…venturing back to the day where the devil and I saw eye to eye…a time where innocence was rightfully mine…how old was I…once again five…the age of five for me personally seems to be a period in my life where trials were to be learnt…

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whether or not I took heed would depend upon my knowledge of good and evil…my understanding of right and wrong…my education of the world around me was limited to my social surroundings this much is true…but like every human being

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intuition and emotional complexities relied on my soul having direct communication with my heart…although I was ignorant of many dangers concealed in the big wide world…

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I was far from innocent when being aware was concerned…after all my senses were sharp and crisp at such a ripe age…every day was a fresh challenge not knowing what could happen…every parent has the dilemma of protecting its offspring…keeping the child secure and safe from the vulgarities of the outside world…

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amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus

hiding the reality of what awaits…the danger every human being will eventually have to face…there is no natural predator apart from the human race…replacing reality with fantasy is one way the parent believes the child will remain innocent for as long as possible…

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painting a glossy image in the child’s mind that the world at large is no more than a fairy tale ending…happy ever after is so far from the truth…when the child is old enough to understand the facts of life…they go in pursuit of a dream that lacks the knowledge of what true happiness means…

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meanwhile the child who is ignorant of the dangers that exist…will lose their innocence to a fantasy world where the devil knows too well…ignorance is a false bliss that fools the pure at heart into believing the world is full of trust and love…

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extracting the fact wickedness is rife…answer me this my invisible other if I was to tell a child the truth about the horrors that lurk not under their bed…but around every corner they will ever tread…would they loss their purity of heart…would the truth be so damaging the child would become traumatised for the rest of their life…

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my answer would be if you don’t mind me saying my dear…Ignorance places the child in the dark…every child’s worst nightmare…truth leads to purity…to know the wrongs doesn’t rob the child of innocence…on the contrary…it enlightens the mind to being always on alert…aware…conscious…

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amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus

fortunate for myself I didn’t need an adult to tell me the devil is a myth…no more than a old wife’s tale…because if they did I would’ve sensed an unbelief that was a mismatch of my own sense of well being and what I thought to be real…

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the devil my imaginary friend is an open foe…maybe he pretends to be a friendly adviser but that doesn’t stop any soul becoming the wiser…you just have to keep your eyes peeled on the battlefield…

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when I first became acquainted with Amadeus I was fully aware of the game he played…I desired to be a player on the opposite side of wrong…subconsciously of course my dear…I had read a subliminal message that made everything safe and sound.

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amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus

Breakfast…the start of a day like most…nothing out of the ordinary to write home…the sun had risen…everything was the same…in its place…the only thing that had change from the night before…the date…it was a brand new day…I was one day older but no wiser than yesterday…

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although the age five may seem tiny in comparison to an adult brain…the reality is my imaginary friend its compact…expression is freshly unrepressed…emotions are displayed freely without want or encouragement from another human being…if you were happy you smiled sometimes laughed…

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if you were hurt by another human being you would cry sometimes scream out loud…whether it be the feeling of pain…or fear of retribution…Innocence affects the heart of every human being…nobody can physically tell a lie without the heart being unaware of the falsehood…the heart immediately voices its objections…

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the soul instantly becomes aware of a sinking feeling…a sense of falling…guilt brings the lie to light…once the soul recognises the consequence of telling a lie…it’s given free will to make a choice…right or wrong…straight down the middle…if the heart fails to take control of the ego…the soul will follow its own desire towards evil…

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amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus

erasing the truth taking a lie on board…weakening the heart with a black dot…an ink stain…no bigger than a full stop blots out your purity one dot at a time…becoming not exactly innocent…the more the soul goes unchecked…the heart becomes like a dried up ink well…

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an empty vessel that refused to write about the Bright side of life…so you see my dear…falling from grace is an innocent’s worst nightmare…back in the day hell was a swear word…if you are honest with yourself my invisible other…you would have to admit you knew very well when you were doing wrong…

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maybe not at present my invisible other…but looking back to the first time you committed a crime…whenever we cover up our own conscious it remains to be seen…you become guilty until innocence is restored…replenished…although at the age of five I was unable to write…I was able to read…

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picture books expanded my dictionary…little red hiding…sweet and innocent…the woods that paved the way would in reality darken the deeper the basket of goodies went astray…I’m sure red riding hoods mother warned her child…it will be getting dark soon…stay on the trail and don’t talk to stranger’s…don’t forget to say Hi to granny for me…a plus side with a double negative…

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why did the mother send her daughter on a errand after she reminded her of the danger’s that lurk…surely the magnitude of what might happen if the wolf appeared was not an immediate threat as far as her daughter was concerned…

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amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus

the illustration in the book I was reading included a porch light that cast a shadow that crept in from either side of the trees…I knew very well it wasn’t going to be long before the big bad wolf turned up…

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I wondered a lot…what was red riding hood thinking…maybe she thought if she was in any real danger her mother would’ve never let her go outside alone…without a sense of urgency in her mother’s tongue the child wouldn’t take heed…unless my dear…she was told do you understand me…just to make sure

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if the reply was a reluctant yes…you will know it’s fully understood…if it’s a gullible yes…danger lies ahead that’s for sure…a testament that’s put to the test…you will fail if you lied about understanding…damaging your sense of self awareness…

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one dot of an I at a time until blindness becomes the hood of an adult in trivial pursuit…

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a witness protection programme is already installed in your heart from birth…follow procedures…happy days will be yours

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Breakfast…someone else had awoken that day…a complete stranger…a man who was about to volunteer to work the devils magic…little did I know…later that day my fate laid in the balance…Amadeus was in the neighbourhood…

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amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus

how did I know…finishing getting dressed I headed outside to play…I wasn’t allowed to roam the streets I was given limits…restrictions that sometimes bothered me…mainly when I broke them my dear…no one was around I was bored…there was only one place I wanted to be…

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inside my shed…puppy love…puppies….how many…I didn’t care…I wanted in…to be amongst those bundles of joy…to me that was heaven…unfortunately the shed was off bounds…I was told not to go into the wooden shack under any circumstances…why…was my reply…do you hear me was the conversation killer…making the outside world an open prison…

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I obeyed for the time being…wandering off down the alley…heading into the danger zone across the road…I thought I won’t go far…just to the kerb and back…the alley was short not long…a go between through a row of houses…

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crossing my path in the distance was a dog without a lead…I coaxed the dog with a command…come…upon hearing my call the dog came running straight up to me looking to be stroked…upon fussing the waggily tail I looked up…

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I saw a figure of a man walking down the middle of the road heading towards myself and my new furry friend…I was unsure about the whereabouts of the owner of the dog…at first I thought it to be a stray…escaping the confinements of a backyard somewhere nearby…when I appeared on the scene…no one was in sight…

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apart from the stranger who was now walking passed myself and the Labrador…he carried on walking to the end of street…stopping in his tracks…

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he seemed to be making sure no one else was around…I watched every move he made…turning myself in the direction of the could be predator…

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I carried on patting the excited dog who kept my small talk company…the stranger approached my privacy…overshadowing my fun instantly making my heart feel uneasy…I turned my focus to the smell lingering in the air…a cocktail of fear mixed with a musky scent…laced with excitement…a feeling of urgency entered my soul the moment I looked the devil in the eye…

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amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus

I watched him put both hands in his pockets…placing the thought of strangulation on hold…he shifted his weight from right to left foot…dancing on hot coals…dropping his gaze to the floor a voice with a nervous twitch asked me a question…

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I see you like dogs…how about puppies…

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you see boys and girls Amadeus is a bringer of gifts…ten minutes is the time it took for the devil to turn my hearts desire into a fantasy that hid reality…releasing one white knuckled fist from his jeans…he offered my heart a hand to hold…

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I knew systematically what he had to offer was superficial…I had no reason to trust him…the love between us was zero…he had a twinkle in his eye when he said…come with me I will show you a good time…something along those lines…I didn’t hear the end of the conversation…for a split second I did think about going with him…

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amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus

I felt a mean streak…what if the potential threat wasn’t dangerous and he was telling the truth…I didn’t want to be rude…if anger had played a part that day…wanting to teach my mother a lesson…seeking puppy love elsewhere…grabbing his hand tightly as I skipped off into the sunset…

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seeking puppy cloud nine…heading straight into a hell hole…the unknown with a paedophile in tow…the tragedy would’ve sunk in far too late…

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the sight of no puppies brought reality back home…Charley says…starts playing on my mind…an advert on the TV gave me my cue…

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at the top of my voice I sent alarm bells ringing…MUM…louder still MMUUUM echoed back down the alleyway…the unexpected cry for permission awoke the mind of lustful pride…like a shock to his system…he was tasered

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shrivelling his balls and any thought of child porn in a blink of an eye…I turned around and ran back through the alleyway…screaming at the top of my lungs…trust me my dear I have big mouth…all the better to eat you with my dear…MUUUM…CAN I GO WITH THIS MAN TO SEE HIS PUPPIES…I knew he wasn’t following me…I had a glitch…

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amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus

the moment he became weak at the knees I knew he was up to no good…making my escape I ran home to expose the devils failed plan…my mother telephoned the police…when they arrived I agreed to go for a ride…

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I described the villain the best I could…pointing in the direction I wanted the policeman to follow

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without taking a blind bit of notice of my directions towards the crime scene…the bobby on the beat…drove me out of my neighbour to the local school…asking me if the culprit was anywhere to be seen…I replied with a negative so he drove me home…

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it was my mother who informed me the pigs didn’t believe my near kidnapping charge…they accused my heroic call for back up…a bunch of lies…trust me my invisible other I wasn’t the one telling porkies

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immediately turning my trust against authority…my mother went on to say never you mind…idiots are a plenty in the world…

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you did the right thing you have nothing to be ashamed of…later that day…I kind of agreed…after I had sneaked into the shed and fulfilled my needs…where’s the harm…I only wanted a cuddle from my buddies…a few days later the puppies were all sold on…leaving me with no regrets…maintaining my innocence

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The way I saw things…my mother was occupied she had other things on her mind…she wasn’t worried about the puppy invasion…she was relieved where ever her imagination did roam…knowing she could trust me to do the sensible thing…I was safe and sound…that’s all that mattered for now…

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I didn’t stay long just an hour or so…choosing the lesser evil…yes I agree I broke my mother’s law…I queried her judgement…as far as I knew…so long as she was none the wiser…the consequences were small in comparison to the amount of pleasure that’s all mine…I couldn’t think of a valid reason why not…so I disagreed…

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if she found me out…my hands where in the air…guilty as charged…choosing truth as a guide line…Innocent until proven guilty…I was upholding every man made law…I told the truth wanting to bring a bad man to justice…didn’t I…not much has changed in today’s day and age

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I apologise for my own understanding of life…according to the path I’m walking on…it’s been a journey I will never forget in a hurry…a blessing in disguise my dear

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amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus…amadeus

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